I doubt 24 is blowing the SG kisses
Suprising as it may sound, SG has issues with Kobe. I surmise that SG once tried to pick up Kobe at the club and was publicly denied in front of both Rick Reilly and Mike Wilbon, but this has never been confirmed.
In his Finals Game 3 column, SG asks questions he already has biased answers to, and then answers them in a style that is both fresh and something he's never done before. He also manages to take jabs at Kobe with each answer, even when it doesn't seem at all applicable.
Q: Did we learn anything significant from the Lakers' 87-81 victory Tuesday night?
"...Bennett Salvatore and Joey Crawford were about as impartial as Aaron Spelling when "90210" was casting the Donna Martin character in 1990, which was what you'd expect from "reliable" referees. Kobe bitched about every noncall, earned a "T," glared at teammates and added to his reputation as the next MJ ... only if MJ had severe anger-management issues. Which is what MVPs should do. (Oh, wait, that's not what MVPs do -- forget we mentioned that one.) "
"...Bennett Salvatore and Joey Crawford were about as impartial as Aaron Spelling when "90210" was casting the Donna Martin character in 1990, which was what you'd expect from "reliable" referees. Kobe bitched about every noncall, earned a "T," glared at teammates and added to his reputation as the next MJ ... only if MJ had severe anger-management issues. Which is what MVPs should do. (Oh, wait, that's not what MVPs do -- forget we mentioned that one.) "
This Kobe rant is to be expected from the SG, it's almost too easy for him to work it in, but it gets better. After going on a rant about how tough Paul Pierce is and how stupid Laker fan is for calling him out for his knee-capades, he somehow manages to work in this jab.
Q: What was the funniest part of the game?
"In retrospect, Pierce's only mistake was not diffusing the Lakers fans before Game 3 by settling with his right knee out of court and buying it a $4 million diamond ring."
Nothing like a rape jab to really get to the core of the MVP.
If you want to read the rest of the column, it's right here. Note: Kobe also won the award for the runner-up to the funniest moment. I don't quite understand how you can be the punch line to the funniest moment and also runner-up to that same moment, but this is SG, you must remember he plays by his own set of everyday guy next door bullshit rules. Oh and if you are curious, SG shits on Kobe in five of his first seven questions. Real classy stuff.
2 comments:
I just want to thank you for this gift you've given society. I put this on par with the invention of the telephone and sliced bread. Let's get some contributions from Sweeney here, with each post beginning with... "ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?!"
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